Culinary folklore has it that the pungent Époisses cheese possesses a stench so foetid its transportation on some public transport networks in France is outlawed. Now, I am an avid fan of any cheese that threatens either my health or liberty, so I was keen to try this.

Initially, I felt let down: this Tesco Finest Époisses was not really the olfactory ravaging I had been hoping for. It has a ripe, pungent odour, but it is more that of a lukewarm walking boot than an open sewer or music-festival Portaloo. In some ways this was a disappointment. I suspect that the Tesco Époisses (which has to travel much further than a French public transport network) is not the most devastating of the genre. However, significant further consumption encouraged me to reconsider this cheese on its own merits. This is relatively mild for a washed-rind cheese, creamy, but with distinct farmy overtones which are tasty but not too overwhelming. While the odour and appearance are perhaps offputting to relative cheese novices, the taste is much mellower and creamier than might be expected. It is ripe, redolent with the earthy notes of a well-trafficked barnyard, but not overwhelming or aggressive.

In fact, multiple previous attempts to review this cheese have met with failure – not because of run-ins with local dairy transportation law-enforcement agencies, but simply because we ate all of it long before I was able to take a photo for the review. This is the third attempt at an Époisses review, which is a mark of how intrigued we are by this soft cheese. While pondering scent-based metaphors for this review I found myself salivating wistfully at the prospect of having to buy another one just to experience its tantalising scent again.

Époisses is a washed-rind soft cheese similar to Langres. Made from unpasteurised cows’ milk, while ripening it is regularly smeared with Marc de Bourgogne brandy. This gives it a rusty, gnarled rind, disturbingly sticky to the touch and somewhat offensive to the olfactory senses. The inside is a soft, creamy paste, perfect for dipping bread or crackers in.

Usually served as a dipping cheese after a hearty meal, Époisses is typically matched with crusty bread and a red wine like Pinot Noir. I tried it in this context, spread on thin crackers, and just eaten on its own. This is a soft cheese not designed for solo consumption, and in such circumstances the farmy experience may be overwhelming. Spread on bread it was pretty excellent; allow it to warm to room temperature for a few hours before consuming. To me, this Tesco Époisses functioned as a spicier, more intriguing alternative to standard spreadable soft cheeses like Brie, which lack the interesting farmy twist. I matched this with a pretty mediocre J P Chenet Merlot (I suspect most red wines would be better than this) and Tesco’s surprisingly decent rustic white baguette.

Époisses is a close relative of Langres, another washed-rind cheese with a similar appearance; both are available in Tesco. Conventionally, Époisses is stronger and farmier, but we did not find that to be the case here. We found this Époisses substantially creamier and less barnyardy than the comparable Langres, which was something of a relief (though we haven’t tried them head to head… yet). The result is a fairly smooth, creamy spreading cheese, with more than enough taste to hold its own on crusty bread.

For its understated farmy twist to a smooth, creamy cheese, I rate Époisses 7.5/10.

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